Winter Time

Winter is here...noooo! The brisk, cool air and the powdery snow is like an old friend to snowboarders and winter sportsmen alike. However, for the rest of us, it's 6 months of gloomy, dark days of scraping off our frosted windshields. Basically, winter is a curse. It acts as a barrier to the outside world. Not only is it frigid outdoors, but darkness sweeps the streets at 5 pm. So long exercise, hello chocolate chip cookies! Being outside for longer than 5 minutes goes beyond the call of duty. If I'm exposing myself to the biting cold air, it better be for a good cause - like saving a kid's life or my own. All other activities are limited to taking out the trash and getting in and out of the car.

This forcible confinement inevitably leads to weight gain and boredom. Case in point...I'm writing this blog post after consuming a near triple digit amount of chocolate chips. If it were warm and light outside, my choice of activity wouldn't be the same. Exercise would have trumped the semi-sweet morsels...or at least preceded them.

Darwin believed that we evolved from apes, but another animal we may be linked to is the bear. Although we aren't as ferocious (some may argue with this) as the hairy beasts, we hibernate in the winter and store fat on our bodies to keep us warm. I would say that's pretty similar.

There were times in past winter months when my regular exercise routine felt like a 20 page term paper due tomorrow. The burden was too heavy. I would be incredibly hard on myself for not doing it. However, after losing the battle to warm sweat pants and hot chocolate (10 years in a row), I have learned that this is natural. I wouldn't want to deny nature of what it deserves, would I? I shouldn't be selfish. Nature wants me to comfortable, to eat an extra cookie or 2 than usual, go to bed early, exercise only when I feel like it (like a 20 minute bike ride on the lowest level, twice a week) and watch more movies. It's that time of year to be more giving...to yourself. It would be prudent to not let yourself go completely, but gaining a few extra pounds is not only okay, but intended.

Some of us have to do what we have to do to get through the winter. For me, it's baking gingerbread men and giving Jack Frost the finger. Happy Holidays!

Save the Date

I was going to say that I recently got a wedding invitation in the mail that said "Save the Date" to make this post relevant, but it's not true.
The thought came to me about "Save the Date" and the whole concept seems funny to me.
My roommates in Seattle would get those invitations and they would be on our fridge for what seemed like (and probably was) years.
When people send a wedding invitation requesting people to "save the date", they are asking people what they're doing Friday night in 2020.

"Will we still be friends by then?"

A lot can happen in a 8 years. People move, have kids, have financial crises and maybe even die. There could even be a 'save the date' in between someone else's 'save the date'.

Are you in denial of your own engagement? "Let's just get engaged, set a date for 5 years in the future and see what happens. Maybe if we tell our friends about it, then maybe it will make us want it more."

I support the idea of a long courtship and a short engagement. People don't really like going to weddings anyway so by asking them to reserve some date in the distant future, it causes them some committment anxiety - because they know that you know that you don't know what you're doing June 12, 2020. By technically not having any set plans on that date, you automatically feel obligated to go.

So, be kind and practical. The date is June 12, 2012. Be there or be square.

Update - I've changed my mind

Hello blog readers! That would be just me...and family members and friends who kindly read out of support or boredom.
It's been a while since my last update. I tend to go through moments where I'm really excited about a particular activity - like blogging. Then I crash and burn a few months later. "It's too much work" or "I don't feel like it." Well, today I feel like it. I'm turning over a new leaf. I listened to Elder Holland's conference talk from this last conference and it instantly changed my perspective on life. In a world of competition and envy, we are at times blinded and don't recognize what we already have. We get jealous of other people's fortunes and blessings that we neglect our own. I discovered that there comes a time when being kind and loving other people (despite what you think you lack and they so undeservedly have) is so much easier than holding on to anger, bitterness and resentment. It allows you to more fully enjoy your life and look forward to the blessings awaiting you. I have been extremely uplifted ever since.

I've changed my mind on a few of the topics I've addressed in my previous blogs.

First, Online Dating. I'll stick to one thing positive and that is that I don't regret trying it. However, I will never do it again. More bad experiences came from dating computer profiles than good. I would say that about 80 percent of the people on there are pretty odd. The common problem is people's inability to communicate well face to face. A lot of the people who date online just lack some of the most basic social skills. That's pretty big when it comes to dating. I am officially done with it and therefore, I no longer date. Haha. That's the draw back. People may be weird, but they do ask you out. I guess it's back to juggling bowling pins in a coconut bra to get noticed.

Second, Facebook. This has not changed actually. I have enjoyed the long abscence of useless updates. I don't think I will ever go back. However, I did join Twitter. I did this for work purposes. I felt I needed to be more updated on what's going in the world. It's kind of important for the field I'm in.

Well, that's it.

Would you Rather....?

My sister and I have been playing this game, "Would you rather?", for the past couple of months. There are no deck of cards involved nor dice or a game board. It's just a simple, yet not so simple, question. When one of us thinks of grotesquely comparative situations, involving anything from skin diseases to heinous dates, we pose it to the other person. They must choose! We don't challenge each other to test out their choice, but just the thought is enough to make us laugh out loud. Some examples are, "Would you rather have a date who talks really loud or stares?", "Would you rather be buried alive or eaten by a pack of wolves?", "Would you rather have yellow, crooked teeth or really bad acne?" "Would you rather eat a handful of lint or a handful of dirt?" One of my favorites (it gets me every time) came from one of my friends, "Would you rather drink a pint of pee or a handful of crap?" Those are his exact words.



One Would you Rather? has proven to be the most difficult for us fathom. My sister and I have taken opposing sides on this one. Would you rather be obese or confined to a wheelchair? I have taken the liberties (without my sister knowing) to further equate the debilitation of both situations. If you choose to be obese, you are incapable of losing the weight. No surgeries, no weight loss programs or miracle diets will change your size or improve your health. You will be obese until the end of your life. The same fate is determined for confinement to a wheelchair. Surgery, rehab and revolutionary technology are not available options.



What would you choose?



OR

Online Dating

Over a year ago, after complaining about the lack of dating prospects in my area to my bishop, he recommended I try online dating. I looked at him, shook my head and said, "No way. I'm not to that point yet", as if online dating was the last resort; an act of despertaion and despair. When I moved back to Salt Lake I found myself in a social predicament. It felt like I was in a new city, but this time there were people I knew. I had old friends from high school and family connections that could have been my social network. However, that is not what I wanted. In fact, it's these "friends" that I've been avoiding via distance for all those years. I wanted a clean slate; to forget the past and meet new people. The only problem was, I didn't know how or where. The most logical place to start was church. It's now been nearly 4 months since I've been in my ward and not a single friendship has blossomed. Why? I can't put all the blame on others. I have not been very proactive in meeting people. However, most of the people in my ward are below the age of 22 and are Olympus affiliates, to whom I have an automatic prejudice. The next idea I had was to volunteer somewhere. That'd be a good place to meet people, right? I tried looking for the right opportunity, but that idea never panned out well so that was out. I even considered attending an institute class at the U. When the day came, I discovered that I just couldn't do it. I wasn't afraid of going alone or meeting people. It's that I'm too old for institute! The institute vibe is very much associated with the college scene; young and naive people. After a lot of brainstorming and lonely nights, I decided to give online dating a try. For the first couple of weeks, it was more for laughs than actual searching. I got some pretty hilarious messages from guys who were either doing it for sport or they were serious and creepy. Either way, it gave me a good laugh. After a month now of dating online, I've discovered I actually like it! It's a great way to see who's out there, other than people who are in your ward or people you went to high school with. Going out on actual dates has been a slow process, but it's coming along. I have two this week! I never thought I would ever sign up for an online dating site, but I'm now eating my words...and I like the taste of them.

Deactivated

If someone were to hear the word, "deactivated" about 20 years ago, they'd think of Macguyver dismantling a bomb with nothing, but a paper clip and shoe string in 20 seconds. These days, the word tends to gravitate to the shocked horror of Facebook enthusiasts, "You deactivated you Facebook account?!" or Facebook addicts, "I wish I could do that." That is precisely what I did last night at around 10 pm. I deactivated my Facebook account.
It wasn't a premeditated action nor a reaction to an ex-boyfriend's status that promted me to take me off Facebook radar. Rather, I was sick of looking at it everyday when I didn't have a reason to. All these "friends" share special memories with me or we just happened to sit next to one another in a class 5 years ago. Last night, after reading yet another update on so and so's daily workout report, what one friend's kid ate for breakfast and another quote on the purpose of life, I had had it! This is a waste of time! No one ever has anything good, interesting or useful to say. However, that is their perogative. It is within their constitutional right to say, "I'm taking a dump right now - Dulles International Airport with John Doe." It's also within my constitutional right to never have to read this garbage. Rather than taking the time to inform my 200 friends who really couldn't care less, "Katie Crump is going to run 3 miles and then heading to the gym to lift weights for 30 minutes, stair master for 20 minutes and then a nice cool down with my soothing Sarah McLachlan remix", I am just going to do it instead!
I am not condemning Facebookers, but rather this is just the ranting of a social networking burn out. Some people find the updates and status' fun and informative and use it as a creative way to keep in touch. Not a bad idea, Mark Zuckerberg, not bad at all. I just need a break and want to devote my time to something with a little more substance.
I don't know how long I'll be off Facebook. My reference to Facebook addicts wasn't far from the truth. Depriving yourself from this daily visual substance is simultaneously empowering and unnerving. Maybe after completing the 12 steps, I can officially delete my Facebook account. I will prevail!

One Day At A Time

When I've felt stressed or down and discouraged in the past, the phrase "take it one day at a time" was often brought to my attention. This would come either by my own conscience or in the form of advice from loved ones and self help books. This used to frustrate me to tears. "How do I take life one day at a time?", I would scream either in my mind or in my pillow. To me, living in the present was impossible. How do you just ignore the future? I'm a planner, therefore, I need to schedule my life for the next five, ten and fifteen years. Although it isn't a bad thing to plan for the future, it is an unfortunate and somewhat detrimental trap if you are only living for the future. The likeliness of your disappointment is almost guaranteed. You can never be happy, because you're only thinking of what will be, not what is. The truth is, you most likely will not be happy with what will be if you are not happy with what is. The person who thinks this way, isn't truly happy. I have no doubt that the foreseeable future will be a stark improvement from your present circumstances. However, with the logic that you will only be happy when certain life events take place such as; when you move out of your parents house or when you quit your job or when you get married or when finals are over or when you graduate or when you get into a career, you will not only miss out on good opportunities to be had at this phase of life, but you may not be the best you could be when that anticipated future event arrives. In fact, it's possible you'll be disappointed with the outcome because you can only be satisfied with a better than now scenario. Right now, the present moment, may not be where we want to be forever. It may not even be where we want to be for the next 5 minutes. We hate it that much. I've been in that mind set for many years. It's possible that today is just a good day and I'll wallow in negativity tomorrow. I know how hard it is to stay positive about something that shouts discomfort, anger, disappointment and a myriad of negative emotions. This is where "take one day at a time" comes in handy. You don't have to necessarily decide that today is the last day of your life. If that were the case, I'd be doing all sorts of crazy, spontaneous and somewhat irresponsible things because there will be no tomorrow to account for it. However, in this case, there will be a tomorrow. We're just not going to think about it today. Instead, focus on how you can be productive, serve someone, learn something new, call a friend, read a book, etc. I've attempted this in the past, but failed because I allowed my mind to worry about the future. The thought of doing all these different tasks or goals everyday overwhelmed me. Now, I just focus on the present day. I'm aware of tomorrow, but it doesn't concern me right now. Today, I am doing yoga, studying my scriptures, writing this blog entry, attending the temple and calling a friend afterward. Will I do these things tomorrow? I don't know. I won't know until tomorrow.